Nasihat makcik ....komunikasi

 Semalam, dua posting kat fb menarik perhatian cikson. Dua dua ada sangkut paut dengan sifat cenge. Cenge ni orang utara punya sebutan utk garang. Satu posting di tulis oleh isteri mengadu cengenya si suami dan satu lagi pula si suami ttg isteri.

Well.... dalam hidup berumahtangga ni bertuah lah pasangan kalau semua kriteria/ character pasangan sedap ditelinga dan mata. Yang terjadi ... disebaliknya.

Posting pertama...sipenulis menulis tentang suami yang senang lenang mengeluarkan perkataan bodoh utk isteri. Walhal isteri lebih berpendidikan dan membantu dalam perbelanjaan rumah. Sedikit silap sikit bodoh. Hilang/ silap letak barang bodoh. Suka sangat si suami membodohkan si isteri.

Kalau makcik... bila banyak sangat dibodohkan, sila buat bodoh. Buat pekak. Buat tuli. Entahkan semua. Kalau hilang apa2 jangan bagi tahu dia. Bila dia tanya jawab Entah. OR Orang bodoh mana tahu apa apa. 

Sebenarnya lah kan..suami yang membodohkan isteri tu sebenarnya tercabar tgk isteri sedikit bijak dari dia. Dia mahu jadi ketua, penentu keputusan, tapi tak bijak. Keputusan selalu salah. 

Narcississ orang begini.

To tell the truth my other half fav. word was DIAM!

Jangan nak bagi pendapat. Nanti yang dapat ialah DIAM. So what I did I diam . Tanya apa diam. Shrugged my shoulders. Geleng my kepala. 

Ehhh you bisu ka? Tanya apa geleng , angguk.

Kan you suruh I diam. So I diamlah. Haha...

But truth be told. No amount of diam or quarrel changed our way of communication. Until I came across a book "HOW to deal with difficult People." Yes, my cikli was a difficult man . Baran, prone to temper tantrum . Just like my late father. 

I read the book and adopted the suggestions. To face the problems encountered by one to one talk. Heart to heart. I laid down his strengths. Then gradually the problem that we were facing. How I felt. What I needed. The consequences  from our bitter feud. And lastly my ULTIMATUM.

After a few occasions, I soon found changes . Less shouting fits and less DIAM! Now both of us are old and we withered our old age together. Been married for 42 years . Syukur Alhamdulillah.

Ada makcik tulis tentang buku tu dalam blog ni. Pi la cari. Type saja kat search this blog.

But DIAM tu dah macam sebati dengan makcik. I dont like to talk much. Just like yesterday,when I helped cikli tend to his wound.....there was no awat niiii? Tu la you ni.... I dah kata . None. I was calm, serene. Tak gelabah bewak... haha.

Anyway... jadi isteri ni kena banyak belajar. Banyakkan membaca. Berserta doa.

To the second posting about a bossy wife. And a stay at home husband. Talk to your wife. In private. List ( In your headlah) what you like about her ( banyak tak pa). Then put up your problem. ( satu cukup). What you feel. Jangan ungkit. What hopes you have for your relationship. What the consequences. Talk in a soothing voice. Sit . Have eye contact.

Dan tolonglah isteri. Ringankan kerja2 rumah. Isteri yang letih dari kerja samalh macam suami yang letih balik dari kerja. Tentu dia gembira balik ke rumah yg tidak caca merba.

I had been in a boss shoe. Tell you... its no walk in the park. 

Thats all folks. Sharing this not because I was pandai or what. Or nak peleceh sapa2. Take this as a shared knowledge. Maybe my writing could help couples at loggerheads with their partner.

Bye...

The Persians ...

 Tap.tap,tap....

Knock.Knock. Rat a tat tat...a rat a tat tat.

I was awaken by a sound that was unfamiliar. Jumped out of bed, hurried to the hall,then switched on the porch lights. 

Heyy... takkan yang dok ketuk mengetuk kat sebelah selatan tu mai dah kat utara.I scanned the porch. It was still . A mother hen was resting on cikli's X trail. 

Hmm, it might be her. In the still morning air, I could see her slumber silhouette.

Tap tap,tap. Knock.knock. Rat a tat tat. 

The knocking noise came again. This time from the side of the car. 

From the nearby mosque, the azan came. I left the window for my Subuh prayer.

Yesterday evening me and my other half accompanied by cikdin, our new found tukang rumah went to the nearby kedai papan. Ehh bukan kedai papan,tapi kedai yang jual barang nak buat rumah.

Haaa...ambik...nak buat awning seciput pun nak dekat RM 1k...Belum lagi masuk upah itu ini. Mahai jugak lah . Dulu masa beli simen sekampit dalam RM 7 ke 8 . Now... wah dah double. 

Rasanya kalau masih bekerja dan ada kuasa, mau cekau duit kontraktor. Minta depa bagi rasuah. Nak lulus apa apa minta ufti. Nak takut apa. Tapi kena masuk politiklah dulu. Baru kebal. 

Heyyy... jangan dok ingat macam tu. Masuk neraka mau?

Tidaklah... tapi geramlah, Yang beri rasuah dah kena denda. Tapi yang ambik,bebas maharajalela. Dunia ,dunia...

What a precedence !

Heyyy... apa kena dengan title post  ni..meleret dah cikson ni.

Actually all the above ada kena mengena dengan budak2 Persian tu. Dah berhari depa terkurung dalam sangkar. Kesian tgk. So cikson dah hired tukang buat awning nak tempatkan mereka. Buat ditepi rumah supaya senang nak tgk depa. Juga buat rumah kucing sebuah.

Tak apalah ,demi keselesaan anak anak bulus tu, mama sanggup korbankan harta @ duit seribu dua. Moga 2 murah rezeki mama dan anak menantu mama. Aku bermonolog.

The Persians are here. Soon they will have a home. So it seems. Harap baiklah budi tukang yg cikson jumpa di fb. Buat kerja dengan jujur. Tak kapur mengapur. Tak macam orang politikla no.

Thats all folks from utara. Harap2 hampa semua sehat sejahtera. Tak cempera macam dewan sebuah negeri ya..

Bye.

Pictures Galore... the cats that came along...

Nina...timid,playful,endearing

Jade...such a dear

the mok brothers

cik tam,the elusive

always thoughtful..

 Those were among them who came into our live. I wasnt into them at first. Then when Nen and Jade entered, I was caught into liking and loving them.

Nen and Jade, two strays that strayed into our home in No 7. I was against adopting them but the children insisted on having them. Well then, mom relented.

Nen, a kitten picked from a restaurant while Jade hitched a ride in my kembara. Both soon became the household favourite. Loving them was a starter to my tolerant for cats in the house.

I think I might have thousands of pictures of the cats that I had taken. Them in their elements. Playful, thoughtful,soulful and all kinds of actions. Those were during the days of the negatives.Cikli must have spent thousands buying the films and developing them. Alas came the flood...

Stories about cats and their endeavour never fail to entertain us. 

Yesterday, we decided to make a cat house for the Persians that came from KL.

Talks to have them adopted stalled.

Cikli wants to make them his own.

Having them might gave me something to write....soon.

Thats all guys. Its free for all to travel now except for those in PKPD zones. Do be careful when travelling. Try not to stop often at public places like the R&R along the highway. Pack your food and drinks. Coming in contact with strangers should be minimal. 

Risau masih bersarang dengan covid ni. 

Juga sailang menyailang orang2 politik.Apa nak jadi? Dah macam apa tah...... Jual diri, jual maruah, hanya kerana pangkat dan kuasa. 

RNF... bertuahlah anda.

 The other day I wrote about RBF.

Well then, I came across a new term..RNF..which is a stark opposite of RBF.

RNF? Whats that. Well,it stands for Resting Nice Face.

Bertuah mereka yang dianugerahi RNF ni. Muka ada nur, muka segak, muka kesian. 

Tambah2 kalau diiringi dengan sahsiah, personaliti yang baik, tentu bertambah2 baik dan bertuah.

One personality that I could associate was the late HM the Sultanah of Kedah, our two terms YDPA. Sultanah Bahiyah, since I was small ,I admire her . In my primary and secondary school days, I was quite an achiever. Thus during prize giving day in school, I was one among the many to receive prizes.Her calm ,smiling face was there to calm us kids who had to climb the stage to receive the prize. She smiled as she handed us the books or trophy. A stark opposite to another wife of a dignitary. Stern and unsmiling. 

Hey... having RNF pun ada setback ,you know.

Remembered one pretty friend of mine. She was such a cutie and attracted many admirers. Jenuh tepis. Amore amore keliling pinggan eh pinggang. Nak jadi cerita, anak tuan rumah yang kami sewa pun minat dekat dia. Takut juga pengalaman tu sbb orang tu penagih dadah. Last2 kami semua kena pindah dari rumah sewa tu. Memory sunggoh zaman kolej dulu.

Orang yg ber RNF pun senang kena . Kena tipu, kena scam dll.

Ha,ni ada pros and cons written by a blogger

Link dia kat sini.... SINI. 

Kesimpulannya... RBF atau RNF sahsiah kita menentukan hidup kita. Kalau rupa paras yang manis digunakan utk jalan yang salah, ranaplah kehidupan. Bukan tak ada  yang manis muka dan bahasa, rupanya bersarang tamak haloba, tipu daya. Sanggup menginaya kaum keluarga,kawan rakan semua. Asal kehendak dicapai, cara tidak dipertikai. 

Dalam keluarga pun ada. Asal cantik rupa, pandai berbahasa itu jadi kesayangan. Di puji dan dipuja. Rupanya itu kadang2 pemusnah dan perosak keluarga. Sebenarnya pengikis harta. Macam cerita Anakku Sazali pun ada.

Cleopatra ,secantik rupa ,secantik nama. Namun pembinasa. A few historical sources reveals that she killed her own siblings through conspiracy. In order to get monopoly and more power to rule her kingdom. 

That Daei too. Handsome orangnya, baik keturunannya. Tapi sayang....menyalahguna anugerah yang diberi.

RBF atau RNF...apa2 saja. Syukur selalu. Jaga tingkah laku. Nescaya selamat .Alhamdulillah.

Lagu 'Azizah' mengingatkan aku tentang RNF...resting nice face pulak dah...

Bye. Thats all folks. Have a nice day. 

Rasa2 budak kecik ni RNF tak?

adik ni chirpy selalu. 

the mummy too was chirpy as a kid.